Excuse me, I don't recall that being your business.
So much to cover here, so little... nah, I have the space and I can find the time. Haven't shared a pet peeve in awhile, not for lack of having them though, trust me on that one. You ever have a bit of information involving your life, and someone else thinks it should be their information? I get this a lot. I like to call them vultures, oddly enough this is also what I called all the students that would circle around the fights in high school...
Detour: If you don't know how to fight, don't fight. I only saw two fights in passing where someone actually pulled a punch and didn't start pulling hair or lashing out wildly like they were trying to impersonate one of those lawn ornaments that would run or swing their arms when the wind blew.
Anyway, back on topic. If it is information you are supposed to know or is relevant to you, then someone will tell you. If not, stop running around like some freakishly obsessed smeagol on crack trying to get your nose into other people's business. And guess what, if they don't tell you, maybe it's because you're lose. A lot of the people that want to shove themselves where they are not wanted, get a secret or nugget of knowledge and can't contain it so they spread it around... causing more people to know what isn't their damn business. How bored are you with your life that you have to, not so subtly, budge yourself into someone else's for entertainment purposes. You wonder why people don't tell you things? Look at yourself. Some people have knowledge that is important to them, it's not important to you outside of curiosity, so lay off. It means something to them. Respect that.
Another point that falls into here. This bugs the happiness right out of me. Stop making other peoples fights and qualms your fights and qualms. Because guess what, they are not your fights and qualms. You have no clue what's really going on, I guarantee it. If there is an issue between two people, it's between them, it has nothing to do with you beyond you being a shoulder to whichever person, or both, you happen to be friends with. Sally could be mad at Sara and said something mean to her so now you ride in calling Sally a bitch and other names like you are morally perfect because you don't know, or care to know, that Sally could have just been going through a very hard time in her life, like a death or something, and maybe Sara provoked it just a tiny bit. You. Don't. Know. Shit. This always works in Sara's favor by the way, not to bash poor hypothetical Sara but it is very easy for her to get a 'Woes you, you're perfect, she's a bitch!' support following by just telling the basics of the tale. Manipulative? Possibly, but some people really thrive on the need to be comforted and praised. Why? I don't have a bloody clue. I am going to go with self esteem issues though. Now, I know I am at fault of doing this kind of thing here and there. Note that I often admit that. Sometimes I am just so angry and hurt and tell the bad parts because I want the comfort. However, there are always multiple parts to every situation. Sometimes people just make mistakes or do bad things and that is the part we focus on because it hurt us. By 'us' I mean the person they did that to, not the friend, mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, uncle or store clerk that hears one side of the story. When I tell my friends about something someone did, I don't expect them to go attacking that person, I would tell them off if they did, because unless it's something horribly unforgivable, it's not their place to make the mess bigger for me by trying to save the day. I'm a big girl. Sometimes I wish they would in certain cases, but I don't honestly condone that kind of behavior. You want to be a friend, be an ear, but don't be that prick that only pays attention to what they are told and then jumps on a high horse of camaraderie marching into war, seriously, you make it worse, and you easily become the bully and the ass hole in the end. No, the "I was only supporting a friend" excuse is not valid. This is something I am also at fault for, riding in trying to make a friends day better by attacking someone else when I didn't have all the info, and yes, they didn't deserve it, and yes I felt like a but smear after.
Eventually Sally and Sara will be friends and work it out once Sara lets what Sally was going through sink into her conscious, and Sally apologizes for her outburst. Then you realize too what Sally was going through, because now you are allowed that knowledge, and that Sally might be a pretty cool person, and you are now the bad guy. You can support a friend without jumping the guns. Take them out on the town, stay in and watch a movie, go bowling for all I care. As much as you want to trust your friends, they will omit information or lie, anything to not get a negative reflection on them half the time, especially when they are already upset or angry and are just looking for some support. Use your head.
Messages here:
1. Stop caring so much about what John Doe knows that you don't. It's not your business and it's very disrespectful of someone's feelings to just want to know their business that could be seriously affecting them for your own entertainment. Worry about your life.
2. Think for yourself. Don't judge people based on what others are saying. Don't attack people you don't even know. Make your own decisions on a person based on facts that you, yourself, discover from actually taking the time to know them.
3. You never know the whole story, so stop trying to play a lead role, it's not about you.
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