Made Me Snort.

Source -> DamnLoL

Whatever Number of Things Manda Hates About Men.

I was browsing for new hair styles when, somehow I happened upon a little article titled: "4 Things Women Hate About Men". Of course I had to click this thing. Upon reading this article, I found that these dislikes do not apply to me, or the women that I know. In fact, these things are pretty much on the bottom of the list if at all. It makes me once again wonder if people who write articles know that the majority of their content is really based off their own qualms, but in an attempt to make themselves feel all, not-alone-and-not-at-all-unreasonable, they generalize their own feelings.

This is the small little, I-can't-believe-this-showed-up-while-looking-for-hair, article:

4 Things Women Hate About Men

So, without further ado! (whatever number of) Things Manda Hates About Men:

1. Arrogance, if you are too busy worshipping yourself, how the hell are you able to know who I am as a person and what makes me happy. It's a partnership, not another stage for you to spotlight on.

2. The whole, I will be someone else in-front of the guys bit. This tells me you are not comfortable with yourself. I don't want to play backseat to your acting abilities. You treat me one way, you better not start treating me another in front of your buddies. Like, suddenly, making crude gestures and sexual innuendoes about me and my body with your buddies while I am right there. Alone, sure. Lord knows I go talk about you with my gals.

3. The insecurity. If I am hanging out with a guy friend, I am not 'fucking' him. Thanks but, I wouldn't be dating you if I wanted someone else. Plus, if you knew me, you'd know I don't much like sex anyway.

4. We are not leaches. We don't have to be stuck together 24/7. Seriously, you go do guy things, I am sure I can find something to do. You don't have to get all paranoid that I'm mad at you or something.

5. I am so not 'her'. Just because some girls are like that, doesn't mean I am. You know how you are not like everything on this list? Well I'm not like all the shit on your list. I may hit a few of them, but not all of them. For instance, if I have doubts about the relationship, you'll know, I'm not going to sneak around trying to figure out if I want to be with you or not. I'll talk to you about it. I don't care if you call that girl on TV hot... Jason Behr is my drool worthy screensaver and that wont change just because we're dating. I don't care if you want to do guy things with the guys and not hang out with me sometimes. Chances are, I will also get sick of you and need girl time. I don't like to be showered with extravagant gifts and tickets to the opera all the time, I prefer the little things.

6. This one has been a LONG time coming. If you are a guy friend to a girl and you start a deeper relationship, that isn't the cue to jump into the intimate relationship bandwagon just because you already know each other. It's great that you already feel comfortable and all that. But people are different in friendships than they are in relationships, and maybe we want those first dates where you truly decide if you want to go down that rabbit hole. And the whole I've-known-you-since-how-long-lets-get-jiggy-with-it is not romantic, it can make some girls feel cheap. it's called dating, go on a fucking date. Unless you've established you're only fuck-buddies.

7. We're different people, get over it. Just because you are miserable or don't like something doesn't mean I have to be miserable with you or not partake in something I like. At some point you are going to have to realize that some things are not my problem. And if you really care, you wouldn't try to stop me or make me feel bad for doing something contrary to what's within your spectrum of comfortable or acceptable.

8. Stop saying we're the emotional ones. I've met more women with level heads than I have men. You are just as bad. Pretending you're not at all an emotional pain in the ass because you have a penis in no way gives you the green light to act like you have a stereotypical female vagina.

9. And this one is for the guys I wont be dating! That skinny little pretty cute girl you are chasing after that is playing with you left and right and doesn't give an actual shit about your feelings... I hate that about you. I hate that you chose those girls to fight for, then turn around and say all girls are like that while still asking me to play wing man.

Mamma Mia Review By Me:

Pierce Brosnan can't sing... seriously...

If I Ran A Business (and other things):

1. I would not ask my employees to do anything I wouldn't do or vise versa.

Meaning:

a. If I can't come into work and be god damn pleasant instead of a grumpy shit, I will not yell at or treat my employees like shit when they come in less than god damn pleasant too.

b. If I throw things around or goof off, I will not yell at an employee for doing the same thing.

c. I am the higher up. How I act and present myself is the exact example of how my employees should act and present themselves.

2. I will anti the favoritism.

Meaning:

a. If Jen is fired for one thing, but Jill does the same exact thing, and they are both the same type of worker, I will also fire Jill. I will not condone the same behavior from one but not the other simply based off who I like more.

b. If Jen and Jill come into work like grumpy shits I will not yell at Jen and not Jill just because I personally feel like Jill has a legit reason. You go to work to do your job. It's not social hour or a psychiatrists office. Suck it up and do what you need to. Don't make everyone else that comes to work miserable with you.

c. I will not treat Jack like he is the best worker ever, take his opinion above all others, and then a few months later leave Jack hanging while I repeat that favoritism with Anna.

3. I will not be above the grunt work.

Meaning:

a. If something that those under me normally do needs doing and they don't have time, I can damn well do it. This also applies to the 'I would not ask my employees to do anything I wouldn't do.'

4. I will not assume people can read minds.

Meaning:

a. If I wanted something done a specific way, I would tell whoever is doing it exactly how I want it done. People can not read my mind, I have no right to tell someone to do something without telling them how, and then yell at them for not doing it my way.

5. I will not give all the credit where all the credit is not do.

Meaning:

a. Yes, businesses have branches and those branches are headed by other people that I oversee. However, if one department does really well, I will not congratulate the head of that department, I will congratulate everyone. Yes, the department head keeps the place running and delegates things, however, if the people under them didn't do their job or weren't there, then that department would go to shit. It's a team effort.

6. If one person is disturbing the work flow I will say adios.

Meaning:

a. If Trisha is a slow worker, does not take direction, or a slacker and frustrates everyone by making their jobs harder and stressing them out, Trisha will no longer have a job. Yes, it is everyones job to work together and get everything done and try to make it work with Trisha, however, it is not my dependable employees job to babysit. That is not what I am paying them for.

7. I will not be influenced!

Meaning:

a. So maybe one employee hates another employee, so they continue to tell me all the wrong that employee is doing, I'm not going to let it influence me. Everyone likes to talk smack for some stupid reason. It's my opinion and my personal observation that will decide how things go. I'm not going to give into the talk of those around me regardless of their position, I'm running the show, I need to have my own damn head.

8. I will not forget my important jobs.

Meaning:

a. It is my responsibility to ensure that the environment in which my employees work is a good one. If there are issues that are making it difficult for them, I need to take action. It is not their job to 'deal' with something just because I don't think it's a problem. Obviously it is making things difficult for them, so yeah, it's a god damn problem.

b. Also, on the other hand, I will not get peeved and obsessive over something that does not negatively affect the business or the employees. I'll realize the difference between what's me having a nit picky power trip, and what's truly beneficial of the team.

9. I do not, currently, employ cyborgs.

Meaning:

a. In the end employees are people. I will remember that. I will remember that sometimes things happening in their real lives or even ridiculous feuds amongst the employees can, personally, affect them and therefore their work.

b. Instead of going off the handle when something is done wrong, I will try first to find out what is affecting the performance of my employee. (see also 'I will not be influenced!')

NOW ON TO PEOPLE WITH JOBS!

The bottom line is, and I could fill this blog just on this topic, you go to work... to fucking work. End. Of. Story. You are not paid to gossip. You are not paid to like your co-workers. You are not paid to be anyones friend. You are paid to come in and do your damn job not to your expectations, but the expectations of those that hired you. Yes, you can have fun at work, you can talk and goof off at work, however, you can do it while working. Heartless? Well I go to work because I need money to live. If you're not going to do your job, what the hell are you there for?

Pretty Fail.

Consider my love for this blog successfully ripped from my still warm body, bludgeoned to putty against the sharp rocks that is the thinking of others, and then squashed bellow a stampede of angry buffalo and those wildebeest from the Lion King. Yes, it is pretty dead, dead like Mufasa without the whole 'lives in you' sequence.