I Hate The Word 'Understand'

Not really, but kinda I really do. It depends on how it's being used, but I have a moderate hate for that word. I'll tell you why, like you had any doubt I would. A lot of people say 'I understand' when your explaining how you feel or what's happening to you, I've even done it, because on some level for some things you can get a basic understanding of what someone is going through, especially if you've had a similar experience. However, you can't understand all situations, you just bloody well can't. For instance, say someone has some mental disease, and that makes their emotions and thoughts rather irrational. Things you consider small take on a more important role to them.  You can't understand that. You can kinda grasp what they're saying, but you're not going to understand it. Their emotions are being irrational, you're not thinking irrational, therefore your not going to understand. Telling someone you understand and then trying to tell them what you think about the situation and what they should do in no way helps. It's going to piss a lot of them off or just make them further upset. It's honestly okay to acknowledge you don't understand. Or at least in my case. I know you don't understand. And that is truly okay. I will react better and respect you better if you tell me you don't understand. Telling me you do when you don't is patronizing to something I've spent years dealing with and learning to understand myself, you can't understand it in five minutes or even five days. I don't tell you 'I understand' as you describe to me how you feel about your mother's death, I wouldn't understand, my mother is alive and she will live forever. I can maybe imagine it, but I wont know how it feels until it actually happens... which it wont... because like I said she'll live forever.


P.S. - I'm actually writing a book, and there is a chapter devoted to this.